A letter for my daughter; My hopes for you

Dear Cara,

It is amazing that you have already been on this Earth for over two years now. From the second you were born, I spent countless hours staring at every inch of your beautiful face and daydreamed about what type of child you would grow up to be. I can already see so many amazing qualities in you and I already feel so proud of the person you are becoming. When I found out I was pregnant with a little girl, I admit that I was excited for the dress up clothes and the tea parties ahead, but I was most looking forward to raising a kind, strong and independent woman. There are so many things I want to teach you, but there are only so many things that can be learned without firsthand experience. Eventually you will leave my little bubble of a world and will begin to encounter situations that I have no control over. I can only hope that before then, I can guide and support you, and do my best to prepare you with the tools that you'll need. Here are some thoughts for you, as you grow and begin to navigate this amazing life:

Don't be afraid to be different. That's what makes you special

Love yourself for exactly who you are. Embrace your flaws. Be confident. What may appear to be a quirk when you are young may end up to be what sets you apart from everyone else when you are older. Some of the most successful and influential people in history were considered outcasts when they were children. 

Live an honest life 

The trust between two people is invaluable. It is an amazing feeling when someone shares a secret with you and knows that you will protect it. Keep your promises. Be honest with others, but most of all, be honest with yourself. Speak the truth but be mindful of people's feelings. 

Do not ever think that you are above a person enough to bully them or make them feel worthless

Be kind. Do your best to treat others how you would want them to treat you. You do not have to like everyone, but you also do not need to tell them why. Be a leader. Stand up for others, even if you're scared. It usually just takes one brave person for others to follow along.

Do your best to avoid drama and gossip, even if it follows you
You will encounter negative people for the rest of your life. Be cordial, but keep your distance. They will only bring you down. Gossip is tempting, but no good can come of it. Let the message stop at you.

Think positively

Always try to view the glass as half full. You can usually find one benefit of a negative situation. This is one of the greater challenges of life, but if you can, it will give you a lot more hope during the times that you need it most. 

Do not base your sense of self worth or value on other's thoughts of you

I don't care how amazing or wonderful you are, there will be someone out there who doesn't like you for how amazing and wonderful you are. Base your worth on the choices you make, how kind you are to others and your good intentions. Those who do not want to see you for who you really are need to stop focusing so much on others and more on improving themselves.  

Let go of your pride and admit when you are wrong

You are not perfect and nobody should expect you to be. People respect those that can say they are sorry.

Don't take life so seriously all of the time

Don't sweat the small stuff. Try to keep in perspective what is important and what is not. Know how to have a little fun. Learn to laugh at yourself once in a while. 

There is a difference between complaining and expressing your feelings 

We all have a moments where we need to feel sorry for ourselves. Make them few and far between, but make sure to talk to someone you trust when life has got you down. 

Learn to forgive, but do not allow yourself to be taken advantage of 

Everyone deserves a second chance because we all make mistakes. After that, reevaluate what role this person is playing in your life and if they deserve to be in it. Only go out of your way for those that would do exactly the same for you.

Do not hold on to feelings of anger or resentment 

The only person you are "letting off the hook" when you let go of anger, is yourself. You cannot live a free and happy life if you hold onto such negative feelings. 

Do not waste time worrying about things that are out of your control 

Worrying just gives you grey hair and wrinkles. It's not easy, but learn to let go and trust that things happen exactly the way that they are supposed to. 

Do not wait around for anyone or any thing to complete your life 

You must find your own happiness. The rest is a positive addition. 

Realize that it is impossible and exhausting to try to make everyone happy all of the time 

I have to admit that I have spent much of my life attempting to accept this. Once you wrap your head around the concept, it is completely freeing. Be considerate, but in the end, do what is best for you. 

Treasure true friendship

Be a loyal and reliable friend. Your real friends have your best interest at heart. They will celebrate your good fortune and cry for your loss. A friendship should not be challenging, but something that would leave a void in your life if it was gone. 

Your best is 100% good enough

As long as you have tried your absolute hardest and gave it everything you had, that is ALL that matters. 

Do not compare your life, your misfortunes or your accomplishments to others

Things are not always what they seem, and you never know what goes on behind closed doors. Everyone has their own struggles and their own story. Try not to be jealous of what other people have.

Always try to put yourself in someone else's shoes
Try to understand other people's perspectives. This will help you to be more compassionate, open minded and less sensitive. Life is not painted in black and white. You never know what someone has been dealing with in their personal life.

Celebrate others' good fortune and blessings 

Tell people that you are happy for them and mean it. Your time will come.

Believe that if you have a dream, it will come true

You must also know that nothing will be handed to you. With hard work and determination, you can accomplish anything. 

Try not to view misfortune or difficult times as something that is happening TO you 

Change your way of thinking and trust that it is a learning experience that will only make you stronger, wiser and better. Usually we do not realize why things have happened the way that they did until much, much later. 

The most important things in life are free 

Place value in health, loved ones, friendship, safety and happiness. Do not take these things for granted.  Society has skewed our thinking to believe that there are more important things. Life is nothing if one of these is suddenly taken from you and none of it can be bought back.

My dearest Cara, I wish for you a beautiful and full life. I promise to lead by example and to support you every step of the way. I will do my best to know when to step in and when to allow you to stumble. You are my greatest creation and I will love you, unconditionally, forever.

All my love,
Mama